Woman Stained In Freak Tanning Accident - TanToday

frankie · 3rd April 2009, 11:55 AM

"All I wanted was a little color," cried 18-year-old Mavis Western to the gathered crowd, "but now I'm stuck with this orange mess…forever!" Western, a student at Johnson High and a Chicago native, is the victim of an unsightly and unusual misfortune - a Mytical Tan. "It was like being in some sort of weird, brown car wash," said Mavis of her Mystical Tan experience. "Mist came shooting at me in all directions! I couldn't see or breathe, but the moment I stepped out of that little box, I knew something was wrong." Frieda Jones, a friend of Western's, was with her when the incident occurred. "When she entered the booth she was normal looking, but when she came out, well, I've never quite seen a glow like that," Jones said. "Mavis seems to have an extremely bizarre skin condition," said Dr. Ronald Smith of Mercy Hospital, who has not actually treated Mavis. "While most people's skin would simply shed the pigment after a few days, hers has seemed to absorb it directly into her melanin-producing cells, creating a permanent effect." When asked if he thought Mavis could ever regain her natural skin color, Dr. Smith replied, "No." Mavis' downtown tanning salon, Planet Bronze, is currently shut down and being investigated by a team of government scientists. Planet Bronze issued a statement Tuesday saying that they were "shocked" by the permanent results of Mavis' tan, but "hope she enjoys her new, bronzed look - just in time for spring break!"

Woman stained in freak tanning accident! - The Chive

engfant · 3rd April 2009, 11:58 AM

Why is this news? Unless this is a 12 year old then they should have smacked the girl for being stupid....

....wait a minute. STOP FOOLING AROUND WOMAN. Enough with the April Fools gags.

navigatin1 · 3rd April 2009, 11:58 AM

Quote:

but now I'm stuck with this orange mess…forever!

Forever? Really? Offer her a free tan to fix it, and change the solution out to poison gas!!!

unity · 3rd April 2009, 12:15 PM

Um, this IS a joke, right? The line of "government scientists" really says it is.

frankie · 3rd April 2009, 12:37 PM

It sure sounds like a joke but it was in my mailbox this morning along with a lot of other things about tanning from google. Notice they did not say what booth it was. Mystical Tan. Hmmmm makes you wonder.

frankie · 3rd April 2009, 12:56 PM

These ARE April Fool’s stories. . . . “Treasure Chest” . . . . C’Mon

Stentor The Chive

LFC's newest transportation system channels Italy

by Dr. Tird Sturgiss, Esq. in The Chive

Lake Forest College has broken ground on a new series of lagoons and channels designed to connect the three campuses via gondola. Drawing on the success of last year's South Campus koi pond installation, which for several weeks took the place of sand volleyball courts behind Roberts Hall, the system is being touted as yet another retention-aiding project.
Obama denies LFC additional TARP funds ,orders immediate liquidation of assets, students

by Bo Woodbridge in The Chive
President Barak Obama announced that his administration will not extend additional federal loans requested by Lake Forest College's president and board of trustees, a move that will likely drive the institution to liquidate its assets and unwind risky students.
Woman stained in freak tanning accident!

by Bee McGee in The Chive
"All I wanted was a little color," cried 18-year-old Mavis Western to the gathered crowd, "but now I'm stuck with this orange mess…forever!" Western, a student at Johnson High and a Chicago native, is the victim of an unsightly and unusual misfortune - a Mytical Tan.
Tyler departs... and plots her revenge

by Bruno Funnypants in The Chive

As the year comes to a close, rampant speculation runs amok concerning the future of soon-to-be-ex-Dean of Students Beth Tyler. Future Ex-Dean Tyler addressed these concerns in her final press conference as Dean last Thursday evening in the Wood Lounge in Durand Commons.
Mailroom offers new service... mail

by Kumquat Starburst in The Chive
Many students at LFC have experienced surprise, confusion, and, in one case, loss of consciousness as a result of the new mailroom trend of delivering mail in a timely manner. Unlike past years at the College, students have been receiving mail within one to two days of its mailing, thanks to new incentives put into place by Mailroom Supervisor Donald Stanley.
Lake Forest College introduces 'swimgolf'

by Mr. Buffalo Wings in The Chive
Lake Forest College will be adding another varsity sport, Swimgolf, this next fall. The decision came about last week. "I am very excited," said freshman Putt Dive. "I used to play Swimgolf in high school, and I can't wait to get it going again next year.
Treasure Chest found: College rejoices

by LEANNE LOU BIRMINGHAM in The Chive
To some, Lake Forest College may seem in debt. However, this all changed on Monday morning. A treasure chest containing $1,000,000 in pearls and other fine gems was found at the back of the underused faculty lounge. "This was a great find and will help us not only pay for the half-existing Sports Center, but will also pay off the College's debt to the well-known Chicago mob," said Lake Forest College President Steve Schutt.
Wildfires explain high transfer rate

by Kumquat Starburst in The Chive
Investigation into Lake Forest College's low retention rate has led to a surprising and ironic conclusion-the students heading for the exits after their first year are as swift as those fleeing an aggravated bee hive, an impeding tsunami, or an approaching wildfire.

northtanman · 3rd April 2009, 01:11 PM

wow, i have a girl right now complaining of her mystical experience last night all messed up. well, at least i offered her to come in tonight when i'm working and i'll let her spray again. wonder if she'll being the news crews too?

Din · 3rd April 2009, 02:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by northtanman

wow, i have a girl right now complaining of her mystical experience last night all messed up. well, at least i offered her to come in tonight when i'm working and i'll let her spray again. wonder if she'll being the news crews too?

Do you have a peach shirt? If not, i can lend you mine!

northtanman · 3rd April 2009, 08:44 PM

stupid kid! it was the instant bronzer that had run on her arm...she never showered it off...and had washed her hands and when the water dripped across her arm...the tint washed away. i grabbed a wet wash cloth and showed her how its just the tint...wiped her arms off and wholla! a nice tan underneath. oh well, she did'nt know...she left happy.

daveigh · 4th April 2009, 12:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Din

Do you have a peach shirt? If not, i can lend you mine!

LOL I bet no one looks as good as you do, in your peach shirt Din!

Cinderella · 9th April 2009, 10:50 PM

Quote:

These ARE April Fool’s stories. . . . “Treasure Chest” . . . . C’Mon

Here is another one....

BIG AL · 10th April 2009, 11:44 PM

Are you sure your foot is where you put the glass slipper?

Tanning Queen · 13th April 2009, 08:27 PM

What is your problems Cinderella? Y ou seem to just say negative things to everyone and really dont have much to contribute. If you don't like it here, LEAVE. Very simple.

3rd April 2009, 11:55 AM	#1 (permalink)
frankie Moderator Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 5,912	Woman Stained In Freak Tanning Accident "All I wanted was a little color," cried 18-year-old Mavis Western to the gathered crowd, "but now I'm stuck with this orange mess…forever!" Western, a student at Johnson High and a Chicago native, is the victim of an unsightly and unusual misfortune - a Mytical Tan. "It was like being in some sort of weird, brown car wash," said Mavis of her Mystical Tan experience. "Mist came shooting at me in all directions! I couldn't see or breathe, but the moment I stepped out of that little box, I knew something was wrong." Frieda Jones, a friend of Western's, was with her when the incident occurred. "When she entered the booth she was normal looking, but when she came out, well, I've never quite seen a glow like that," Jones said. "Mavis seems to have an extremely bizarre skin condition," said Dr. Ronald Smith of Mercy Hospital, who has not actually treated Mavis. "While most people's skin would simply shed the pigment after a few days, hers has seemed to absorb it directly into her melanin-producing cells, creating a permanent effect." When asked if he thought Mavis could ever regain her natural skin color, Dr. Smith replied, "No." Mavis' downtown tanning salon, Planet Bronze, is currently shut down and being investigated by a team of government scientists. Planet Bronze issued a statement Tuesday saying that they were "shocked" by the permanent results of Mavis' tan, but "hope she enjoys her new, bronzed look - just in time for spring break!" Woman stained in freak tanning accident! - The Chive __________________ Frankie Burrell Southeast Sales Executive MR International 706.207.1000 mri.burrell@gmail.com WWW.MRINTERNATIONALPRODUCTS.COM http://www.h10o.com/

3rd April 2009, 11:58 AM	#2 (permalink)
engfant Hall of Famer Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 4,123	Re: Woman Stained In Freak Tanning Accident Why is this news? Unless this is a 12 year old then they should have smacked the girl for being stupid.... ....wait a minute. STOP FOOLING AROUND WOMAN. Enough with the April Fools gags.

3rd April 2009, 12:15 PM	#4 (permalink)
unity Hall of Famer Join Date: Nov 2008 Posts: 1,104	Re: Woman Stained In Freak Tanning Accident Um, this IS a joke, right? The line of "government scientists" really says it is. __________________ “There is only so much logical space in our universe,” Binette said. “Think of it like a Chinese take-out box stuffed with Kung-Pao Shrimp. The more shrimp you stuff in, some shrimp pop out the bottom."

3rd April 2009, 12:37 PM	#5 (permalink)
frankie Moderator Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 5,912	Re: Woman Stained In Freak Tanning Accident It sure sounds like a joke but it was in my mailbox this morning along with a lot of other things about tanning from google. Notice they did not say what booth it was. Mystical Tan. Hmmmm makes you wonder. __________________ Frankie Burrell Southeast Sales Executive MR International 706.207.1000 mri.burrell@gmail.com WWW.MRINTERNATIONALPRODUCTS.COM http://www.h10o.com/

3rd April 2009, 12:56 PM	#6 (permalink)
frankie Moderator Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 5,912	Re: Woman Stained In Freak Tanning Accident These ARE April Fool’s stories. . . . “Treasure Chest” . . . . C’Mon Stentor The Chive LFC's newest transportation system channels Italy by Dr. Tird Sturgiss, Esq. in The Chive Lake Forest College has broken ground on a new series of lagoons and channels designed to connect the three campuses via gondola. Drawing on the success of last year's South Campus koi pond installation, which for several weeks took the place of sand volleyball courts behind Roberts Hall, the system is being touted as yet another retention-aiding project. Obama denies LFC additional TARP funds ,orders immediate liquidation of assets, students by Bo Woodbridge in The Chive President Barak Obama announced that his administration will not extend additional federal loans requested by Lake Forest College's president and board of trustees, a move that will likely drive the institution to liquidate its assets and unwind risky students. Woman stained in freak tanning accident! by Bee McGee in The Chive "All I wanted was a little color," cried 18-year-old Mavis Western to the gathered crowd, "but now I'm stuck with this orange mess…forever!" Western, a student at Johnson High and a Chicago native, is the victim of an unsightly and unusual misfortune - a Mytical Tan. Tyler departs... and plots her revenge by Bruno Funnypants in The Chive As the year comes to a close, rampant speculation runs amok concerning the future of soon-to-be-ex-Dean of Students Beth Tyler. Future Ex-Dean Tyler addressed these concerns in her final press conference as Dean last Thursday evening in the Wood Lounge in Durand Commons. Mailroom offers new service... mail by Kumquat Starburst in The Chive Many students at LFC have experienced surprise, confusion, and, in one case, loss of consciousness as a result of the new mailroom trend of delivering mail in a timely manner. Unlike past years at the College, students have been receiving mail within one to two days of its mailing, thanks to new incentives put into place by Mailroom Supervisor Donald Stanley. Lake Forest College introduces 'swimgolf' by Mr. Buffalo Wings in The Chive Lake Forest College will be adding another varsity sport, Swimgolf, this next fall. The decision came about last week. "I am very excited," said freshman Putt Dive. "I used to play Swimgolf in high school, and I can't wait to get it going again next year. Treasure Chest found: College rejoices by LEANNE LOU BIRMINGHAM in The Chive To some, Lake Forest College may seem in debt. However, this all changed on Monday morning. A treasure chest containing $1,000,000 in pearls and other fine gems was found at the back of the underused faculty lounge. "This was a great find and will help us not only pay for the half-existing Sports Center, but will also pay off the College's debt to the well-known Chicago mob," said Lake Forest College President Steve Schutt. Wildfires explain high transfer rate by Kumquat Starburst in The Chive Investigation into Lake Forest College's low retention rate has led to a surprising and ironic conclusion-the students heading for the exits after their first year are as swift as those fleeing an aggravated bee hive, an impeding tsunami, or an approaching wildfire. __________________ Frankie Burrell Southeast Sales Executive MR International 706.207.1000 mri.burrell@gmail.com WWW.MRINTERNATIONALPRODUCTS.COM http://www.h10o.com/

3rd April 2009, 01:11 PM	#7 (permalink)
northtanman The Good, The Bad, The Banned Join Date: Sep 2006 Posts: 2,971	Re: Woman Stained In Freak Tanning Accident wow, i have a girl right now complaining of her mystical experience last night all messed up. well, at least i offered her to come in tonight when i'm working and i'll let her spray again. wonder if she'll being the news crews too?

3rd April 2009, 08:44 PM	#9 (permalink)
northtanman The Good, The Bad, The Banned Join Date: Sep 2006 Posts: 2,971	Re: Woman Stained In Freak Tanning Accident stupid kid! it was the instant bronzer that had run on her arm...she never showered it off...and had washed her hands and when the water dripped across her arm...the tint washed away. i grabbed a wet wash cloth and showed her how its just the tint...wiped her arms off and wholla! a nice tan underneath. oh well, she did'nt know...she left happy.

10th April 2009, 11:44 PM	#12 (permalink)
BIG AL Hall of Famer Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 1,376	Re: Woman Stained In Freak Tanning Accident Are you sure your foot is where you put the glass slipper?

13th April 2009, 08:27 PM	#13 (permalink)
Tanning Queen Hall of Famer Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 5,766	Re: Woman Stained In Freak Tanning Accident What is your problems Cinderella? Y ou seem to just say negative things to everyone and really dont have much to contribute. If you don't like it here, LEAVE. Very simple.

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